Changes are in store. www.okinawaredneck.com now belongs to me and me only. I need to do some stuff on the backend to get everything pointing in the right direction. So it may be a day or so before I’m back. You can always get ahold of me on Facebook. You know I’m always there. And I’m still waiting on my dirty talk from Lisa and Leslee!!!!
Apr
25
Can some one please give me the definition of “Church clothes?” The boy had his First Reconciliation today. They told us that it was rather informal but to still wear church clothes. So we get up early and make sure everything is nice and clean. The “Ol Lady ironed our khaki pants. We combed our hair and I even shaved.
But my biggest complaint were the people that showed up in t-shirts, baskettball uniforms, cheerleader uniforms etc… Some people had on shorts and flip flops on. WTF? I know God is forgiving and doesn’t care what you wear, but think of the solomity of the ceremony. It’s a big step in a young Catholics life. Don’t you want your kid to remember this day? And what if you take pictures? Drives me crazy.
I really want one of these shirts. There were some Fillies that had these on at Easter. I think with my gut I would look pretty fly.
Apr
23
Overheard in the cubicle next to mine:
Dude #1: I was reading a comic blog and someone had the audacity to say that The Thing could kick Hulk’s ass. That is so stupid. Hulk would keep getting angrier and angrier. So the more he gets angry, the stronger he would get. He would so kick Thing’s ass!!!
Dude #2: I’m not sure about that. The Thing is pretty heavy. He could probably just sit on the Hulk.
Dude #1: No way man. Hulk would be so angry it wouldn’t even be a contest!!!
Dude #2: You know what I always wondered? If Hulk got stuck in a traffic jam, would he get all angry and start tearing shit up? What if someone stepped on his toe? Would he turn green and fight the guy?
O.R.: You have to be freakin’ kidding me. You two grown men are arguing about fighting comic book characters? You are both over 40. Why don’t you talk about who gives the best blow job. An American, Fillipina or Japanese chick.
I crush you!
In this corner, weighing 100LBS!
And by the way, Superman could kick both of their asses and still have time to bed Lois Lane. He’s the freakin’ Man of Steel for God’s sake.
Apr
22
I’m thinking of making some changes around here. This free WordPress is getting on my last nerve. I’ve been in some behind the scenes talk with other bloggers about aquiring my own domain. That way I could really trick this blog out. It would cost money, but not a whole lot of money. About $6 a month actually spread over 2 years. I would have more options when it came to the overall design of the site. Maybe more features and whatnot. I could probably use embedded links to Amazon and other websites so that when you as a reader clicked on them I would actually earn a couple cents.
I think also if I made the changes I would be more enthusiatic about writing too. If I have to pay for something then I will use it. So my question to you my OR’s, do you think I should make the big change or just stick with this? I’m not thinking about doing it because I could make money. With maybe 30 visitors a day I would probably end up having to pay Amazon. I’m looking at the overall creative control of the site. And if there are any type of stores that you would want me to link too, what would they be?
Out!</span?
Apr
21
I was just reading CNN and found this:
Has anyone read this book?
I tried reading it like 20 years ago and lasted about 2 pages. Way over my head. When I was stationed Andrews we had a blind dark room tech. I should say a blind onelegged darkroom tech. We called him, “Doc.” He had to be about 100 when I knew him. One day I was working the darkroom with him, which was a plum assignment when you were hungover, and he was listening to that book. He said it blew his mind. Now I think maybe he was smoking a little medicinal dope for his blindness. He used to smoke in the darkroom all the time but deny it. He rigged up some venting system so you couldn’t smell the smoke. But we could tell because the cherry end of the cigarette would expose a little dot on the xray film. Cold busted!
Although this fossil was old and blind his mind was amazingly sharp. He would ask me to go get him some coffee from the Shoppette and give me a $20. I would always try to short change him by slipping a $1 into his change. He would feel it and call me out everytime.
When we went back to Andrews the second time I had to get an xray and I asked the tech. if they still had a blind one legged guy that worked in the darkroom. He said no, that guy died but they put up some type of dumb plaque in there. I was sad. Doc, if Dr. Hawking kicks it, I hope you and him get together and discuss his book.
Apr
21
Don’t even think about saying, “I requested that last week and you never sent it to me.” Wrong asshole. I keep all of my sent emails and I send sensitive items with read reciepts. You read it on 4/14 or at least opened it. Don’t come to me saying you never got it. Bullshit. This isn’t my first rodeo. Can you tell I’m in a foul mood today? I’ve been sick for 2 days and I have to come back to this bullshit.
Apr
13
Thank you for allowing me to take an extended break. You can read the beginning of my testimony here. I will be more than happy to answer the charges against me truthfully and to the best of my ability. Please remember that all of these charges are alcohol related and my memory may not be the best.
Apr
09
OK, I’ve heard it all now. Someone just called me and said this. The part of OR will be played by myself.
User: Hey, I stepped away from my desk for a minute and when I came back it says the computer is locked
OR: Do you maybe have a work order in and someone is installing software remotely? Some times when we see they are idle we will log off the user and log in and fix issue.
User: No! I’ve been using it all morning with no issues. It just says locked
OR: Hit Ctrl-Alt-Delete and tell me whos name is in the username filed
User: Well it says my name
OR: Type in your password and tell me what happens
User: It works!!!! What did you do?!?!?!
OR: Sir, the computers are set to lock themselves if there is inactivity for security purposes.
User: Well that’s stupid. Everyone will have to call so you can unlock them. You can’t expect us to sit in front of the computer all day and not take a break!!!
OR slaps palm in his face. Please Lord. I know I’m not the best Catholic boy on the block. I tend to flirt. I like porn. But I really want that other job. If you don’t want a mass influx of people in heaven because i sent them there, let me have that job!!!!
Apr
09
Now back to our regular scheduled programing. That other post was lounging in my drafts folder so I decided it was time to let him out. I want to welcome all my new OU fans. I know you are reading this. I know all and see all.
So what has happened in my life since the No Fatties! post? Nothing. I took all my finals and I pulled B’s in all three classes. The 100 on my paper in my history class saved my ass because I failed the final. It was 5 short essay questions and 3 long ones. I answered them all correctly but didn’t write enough according to him. WTF? And I only spent 40 minutes on the test. Get bent. I’m sorry I write so fast and knew the material inside and out. I tired to appeal to him but no dice. I guess I should take my B and walk away.
So….. I’ve been thinking about growing up in my little piece of heaven in Central Florida. I really miss Florida, just not sure about Polk County. Comprende? I really loved my neighborhood and it was nice and peaceful, until Tony moved in. Tony was way older than me. I think at least 5 years. He was the one that got me turned on to beer. Damn him!!! We used to drink Black Label and sit in the garage of the flat top house across the street from me. Ivey remembers those nights. We were the orignal Trench Coat Mafia. We all bought these black overcoats from the Goodwill. Hey it was the 80′s, what do you expect.
Another thing that was hot in my neighborhood was throwing oranges at cars as they drove by on the highway. For you non Polk Countians visiting here, back in the day Polk County was full of orange groves. We had huge ones at the end of the street. And when winter time came along they were nice and full of oranges. Originally it started out as throwing racquet balls at semis as they drove by. We would wait for the bus on that little concrete island next to major freakin’ highway. Look at this picture, only one I could fine. See the little yellow stripes? That used to be concrete too that you could stand on.
Death zone
While we waited on the bus we would throw a tennis or racquet ball at the semi trailers as they went by. If you caught it, it was 10 points. If it bounced first then 5 points. If you threw it in the window of the truck and hit the driver the game was over.
Eventually that turned in to throwing oranges at trucks, which turned in to throwing them at cars, which turned in to God help us. One night we took a bicycle rim and put it in the highway. Nobody would hit that right? Not 2 minutes later a big ass Caddy hits it and starts dragging it. Sparks flying. We laughed. Then those little brains started working. We used to do quite a bit of dumpster diving back in those days. One time we found a child car seat. Hmmmm. What should we do with that? We out a baby doll in it and put it in the road. 2 minutes later, toast. I remember the first time Ivey joined us in one of our escapades. Tony and I told him to help us break these huge limbs off of the punk trees that used to be in front of our neighborhood. Dennis asked why and we told him we would show him. We would lay the limbs across the lanes on the road and sat back and watched. You would hear a car run over them and make a really loud whack. It sounded like they blew a tire.
Eventually we ran out of ideas so we went simple. We would take the garbage bags out of my trash cans and place them in the road. People would just run smack over them and spread garbage everywhere. I bet I could go back there and still find some of my garbage.
Eventually we really ran out of ideas and for some reason we decided to throw wet toilet paper. I filled up a 5 gallon bucket of water and got a couple of rolls of shit paper. I stood next to the road with my back towards oncoming traffic. I had this weird ESP type thing where I could tell when a car was close and I should throw. So I feel a car coming and I turn and fire a wet ball of T.P. It hit right on the star of a Polk County Deputy Sheriffs door. Perfect shot. We took off as he screeched to a halt and turned around. We climbed up the trees in my front yard as he drove around shining his car light. Never did find us.
Look at my parents house. And look at the red car in the driveway. That’s my dads Elvis car. I can tell this picture was taken in the winter because the Sycamore trees that we hid in the front yard are bare. And this was post Hurricane Charlie too because one of them is smaller than the other. Nice cars in the backyard of “The drug.” Holy crap!!! I know what I’m talking about tomorrow!!!
Apr
09
I always talk about me and my job. Today I think I will introduce you to the fascinating world of Aeromedical Evacuation. The Ol’ Lady has been doing this for about 7 years total now and I still find it fascinating every time I talk to her about it. But first a little AE background.
